It’s okay, you guys go ahead, I’ll catch up.
So my posts have been a lot less regular than I intended and there’s multiple excuses I can tell myself as to why I haven’t fully committed to this blog, but the honest truth is that I was putting it off. I felt as though I had zero proof to back up anything I was writing about which made me question whether what I was writing about had any truth in it all. I’ve had a few knock-backs since leaving university and I reached a point recently where I didn’t know how to move forward and create a life that truly makes me happy. After some soul searching (and watching many motivational videos, predominantly by Matthew Hussey) I discovered one big thing that was hindering me from moving towards something brighter and more fulfilling. I believe it’s something so many people struggle with in adulthood and something that perhaps some adults will always live with. This ‘thing’ that I’m referring to is the self-destructive art of comparing your success to the success of those around you.
When I was having knee surgery for the second time, my friends were applying for jobs that would propel them into their careers. When I got an unfulfilling job because I had to, my friend landed an amazing job that she excels in. When I auditioned for my dream job at Disney and didn’t get in, my friend got her dream car. When I got ghosted again, my friend and her boyfriend bought their first house together. Although I was and still am absolutely so thrilled, proud and know that without a doubt my friends all deserve every success and happiness in life, I couldn’t help but feel a slight resentment. Not towards them but towards the fact that none of these personal achievements seemed to be happening to me.
I felt like my friends were all moving forward and were smashing adult life, I even started to feel that soon I wouldn’t be worthy of having any of them as friends. So what did I do? I shifted my perspective, stopped feeling sorry for myself and gave my motivation a boost. Below are 5 strategies I used to pick myself up and get myself going…
- Make a pinterest board full of motivational quotes to remind yourself of the kind of person you want to be. Mine is called ‘words to live by’ and it is full messages that help to remind me of who I want to be, how I want to live and the characteristics I want to embody in my whole self.
- Exercise! I wrote my whole university dissertation on the psychological powers of movement because it’s something I feel so strongly about, yet I was completely ignoring it! I joined a gym, started going to classes and reminded myself of how important exercise is on both the body and the mind.
- Set some new goals. I’ve been wanting a new camera for a while so I made it my goal to save up for the camera and the goal following that is to visit a new place every month with my camera to capture sights as I’m seeing them for the very first time. By setting new goals you’ll be less focused on what other people are achieving and have your eyes set on your own goals.
- Remember that no one has a perfect life. It’s pretty easy to only see the good in someone else’s life but remember that every single person has or has had personal issues in their life. Just because it seems like their life is perfect on the outside it doesn’t mean it is.
- Celebrate your own achievements. No matter how big or small, reward yourself for the all successes in your life. Learn to be proud of yourself and know that you are going forward.
Being a successful adult isn’t about buying a house at 25, having a job you love straight out of uni or meeting someone and moving in with them. Being an adult is about learning, self love and adventure. It’s okay to not have the same as someone else, chances are someone is actually they comparing themselves to you. So take your time and enjoy the ride because exciting things will happen if you believe they can.
Happy Sunday, I hope you’ve had a great week!
Stay kind, Holly Xx